How to shop for baby clothes…it shouldn’t be so difficult, should it? My friends and family keep procreating, which means trips to the baby section to pick out impossibly tiny
doll clothes baby outfits. There, it’s common to feel an overwhelming number of emotions. The emotional roller coaster will typically unfold in this order.
The Four Stages of Baby Clothes Shopping
1. Glee Oh the possibilities! Look at all the tiny things. This is going to be fun. And easy.
2. Shock Oh God, that is the cutest dress I have ever seen. Does it come in adult sizes? Are those little limes appliqued on it? Why, why would they make something this cute? Why don’t I have a baby? Maybe I’ll have a girl someday. Should I buy it just in case? Probably. It’s like, an investment in my future. Wait, this is 39.95?! I could practically buy myself an outfit for that price. This is robbery! The pattern was cut from a piece of fabric the size of a bandanna.
3. Confusion Your shopping destiny is heavily determined by if the baby-to-be is a boy, a girl or a surprise. If surprise, good luck finding the oasis of non-existent gender neutral clothing in this pink and blue desert. Give up and buy a bib or bath towel. Just kidding, those are gendered too. And what about the size and season? Pretty soon you’re doing advanced Trigonometry, logic and probability in the store. Average the size of both parents to predict the baby’s birth weight, cross reference with the weather forecast in their part of the country to determine if you should buy short or long sleeve, and triangulate the hypotenuse for good measure. IS THERE A MATHEMATICAL FORMULA FOR THIS? If so, why was I not taught it in school because that would have actually been helpful. Thanks for nothing, Mr. Nelson.
4. Despair What if Jennie only wants to dress her baby in Fair Trade, undyed organic cotton free of both child labor and contrived gender roles? And then this ridiculously expensive tutu onesie ends up in the trash under a pile of dirty diapers? I might as well give up and buy a gift card. Or just cut off all ties with friends of childbearing age and flee the country.
How to Shop for Baby Clothes
Okay so there is a sort of formula for how to shop for baby clothes, but it doesn’t involve triangulating anything. Just take the due date, add the months on the size tag, and then determine if the item will be appropriate in that season.
Example: Due date October 1st + sundress sized 9 months = June. Ca-ching! That’s perfect. The baby will likely grow into this outfit when it’s just getting warm outside.
This is still just an estimate of course, because babies don’t always wear 9 month sized clothes at 9 months old. They could start fitting into them at 6 months, 9 months or 12 months. You just never know! But we just do our best and know that the parents can always re-gift unworn clothing or save it for another child.
What are your best tips for baby shower shopping and how to shop for baby clothes?